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I find that what matters is that we have days like today. My days are capped by university and centered with mom-life. Days like today I wake up early (even though I go to sleep very late) to get my learning in before a day of teaching, cooking, cleaning, nurturing. It is quite hard and feels a bit absurd most days to try and balance meschooling and homeschooling. They cannot be home with me forever, though if you asked them and me today we would say, "sure they/we can." They are content to have a classroom right off the kitchen, overlooking our garden, and watched by our bird Charlie Parker. I am profondly aware that the larger number of homeschooling, back-to-school celebrations are behind us. You know that homegrown life you cannot order through a drive-thru speaker or ask for off a menu, no matter how fancy the restaraunt's table cloth is? There is something about 'back-to-school' that always provokes me to dig a little deeper into my mommy reserves and push myself to make sure the little ones are living a meanigful, learning-filled, well-loved, and homemade life. I was smiling, singing, and dancing along with Anita Baker the kids were laughing with cherry stains on their mouth. And I still managed to place a warm piece of cake into his big hands. Tonight it is cinnamon roll cake and squash (from the garden) bread, both vegan.īy the time E got home I had spent five hours reading and doing Comparative Religions homework, washed dishes twice, and the kids had been taught penmanship, reviewed syntax, read a story from the Canterbury Tales, and started self-portraits. The pounds of tomatoes were organically grown in our backyard. Yesterday evening it was heirloom tomato and vegetable ragu over mannicotti, vegan. She revels in nesting in the most womanly of ways. That her likes cleaning, cooking, teaching and looks forward to her husband walking through the door and breathing in something fresh from the oven or hot off the stove. The one who taught two little ones to read, write, and do math. It is a process, it is the current stage of my life, it is temporary.
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When I open my eyes I know that I will count the hours by pages read and measure my success by pages written, edited, and saved. I have gotten fairly comfortable with the new me. She lives in the creases of literature books, snuggled alongside the spine, and spends her time rearranging words on a computer screen. You all remember that lady, right? She would bake vegan cakes and cookies, weave dishtowels, cook healthy soulfood (sometimes vegan), make leather bags, and quilt. It is not often that I get two days (in a row) to bake, cook, clean, and be the 'old' Mommy.